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Mike Reyes, aka Mr. Controversy, has considered himself a writer ever since he was a child. He wrote for various school publications from about 1995 until 2006, and currently runs both The Bookish Kind and Mr. Controversy, which is an offshoot of the regular column he wrote in High School. He's also a film journalist/critic for Cocktails & Movies and CinemaBlend, as well as the author of several short stories such as "The Devil v. George W. Bush". Any inquiries for reprinting, writing services, or general contact, should be forwarded to: mikereyeswrites@gmail.com

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Friday, September 5, 2008

Convention-al Thinking: Day 7 - Leading By Example

You know what? I skipped GMA today, and I really only saw Cindy and John McCain's speeches. So instead of waste everyone's time couching everything in metaphors and generally talking about how much of a doucheknuckle these two are, I'm just going to publish my notes from last night, with some analysis at the end. Warning: The following section contains the random, spontaneous notes I took while watching the speeches. I was a little liquored, but not as much as I was for Palin.

People with signs saying "Real American Hero"...so McCain = G.I. Joe? Stage now looks like one big upraised middle finger.

Cindy McCain - Did they hypnotize the wife in Manchurian Candidate? I can't remember. Robotic, Stepford-esque, really fake. Trophy wife. "a man who always speaks the truth, no matter what the cost"...so you ARE a cunt? More "USA USA".

Johnny B. Goode as the musical interlude?! You know, for his defense of stem cell research in order to ail his Parkinsons, Michael J. Fox must be ready to strangle a Republican about now. Now "Celebrate"...celebrate my ass. It feels like the "straight talk express" has run out of gas. "Rock This Town"...NO! YOU'RE FUCKING KIDDING ME! YOU DO NOT ABUSE THE STRAY CATS, OR ANY BRIAN SETZER FOR FUCKING HATE SPEECH!

John McCain - "Some call him names that can't be repeated", yeah like "dick face". "he's not in it for the glory", well like Alfred said "Some men just want to watch the world burn" "What good fortune, America will choose this leader" A little presumptuous I'd say. Again with the chanting, continuous chanting. He can't control the crowd, how can he control the country? Wait, he'll veto earmark spending? PALIN LOVES THAT SHIT! "We lost their trust when some republicans..." WHOA! Way to throw the party under the bus. "...where a bureaucrat stands between you and your doctor." We're already there. So we've gone from "we're thinking green" to "WE'LL DRILL THEM NOW!". I'm sorry, I haven't been paying that much attention to this whole damn thing. Old Man Winter needs to go and lose this election already. Ha, ha, they played the music from the end of Rudy.

There you have it. A lazy way out of writing a whole post, and on top of that concentrated Republican hate! In summation, I would say that the Republican party did not hold a captivating enough convention. I mean look at the audience last night, there were EMPTY SEATS! By time Barack accepted his nomination, there was a FOOTBALL STADIUM full of people. This was a convention about tradition. Traditional values, traditional posturing and pandering, traditional character attacks, and even the traditional balloons. Which is why I'm voting for Barack Obama...because tradition, in some cases, suck a cock. Time for new thinking, new ideas, and new politics. Politics where a person can change their mind and not be called a "flip flopper". Politics where invoking the name of a major tragedy doesn't count for credibility, unless you actually fucking earned it. Politics for the people, not the party. It truly is the Smarts v. The Stupids in this election...I just hope the smarts win out.

Otherwise we're in the hands of G.I. Joe and Caribou Barbie.


Chris L. said...

I've uncovered an expanded schematic of the RNC stage you mentioned. This is what it looks like from the air, stage on the top right...


Mr. Controversy said...

Lol, very clever.

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