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Mike Reyes, aka Mr. Controversy, has considered himself a writer ever since he was a child. He wrote for various school publications from about 1995 until 2006, and currently runs both The Bookish Kind and Mr. Controversy, which is an offshoot of the regular column he wrote in High School. He's also authored several short stories such as "The Devil's Comedian", "The Devil v. George W. Bush", and most recently "Wait Until Tomorrow". He resides in New Jersey. Any inquiries for reprinting, writing services, or general contact, should be forwarded to: michaelreyes72@hotmail.com

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Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Media, Darling


So MSNBC is looking for a new 10 PM host, and they haven’t had much luck. Well, that’s because they’re looking in the wrong place. They’ve been courting people who already have preexisting markets on the Internet and in Radio, when what they need is an unknown. Someone who has a limited audience, plenty of stamina and matches the youthful image of the network’s hard hitting approach (along with questionable morals, and a media ready personality). That someone…is me.That’s right, MSNBC, I’m offering you the deal of a life time. Using the same argument that I did back in High School that made me think I’d be assured the chance to play Obi Wan Kenobi or James Bond, I propose to you a plan to both give you a new 10 PM host and make me incredibly famous (or infamous, I’m not picky) at the same time. What argument is that? It’s the “Young and Talented” argument.

The Young and Talented Argument
- I’m young.
- I’m talented.
- I’d sign on for multiple pictures in an attempt to break Roger Moore’s record.
- I have my own lightsaber, and I’ve memorized the moves from the Episode I teaser trailer.
- I have those pictures of your daughter’s drinking illegally in that Texas bar, when the Secret Service was making bets on who’d lose her top first. (We all knew Barbara would win.)
- I’d work for cheaper than some personalities would, and don’t mind the 10 PM slot.
- Olbermann and I would make good friends. (I don’t know Ms. Maddow that well, but I have a feeling she’d be cool too.)
- Jack Donaghy was my VP candidate during the 2008 primaries, and he owns you all!

Ok, so I threw a couple more details in there. The key is, I’m ready and I’m willing to go on live television for an hour and yell about things I don’t have particular stake in, but know something about. Why? Because it’s the way to go these days! You don’t sing or dance to become a star these days, you either lose your clothes on “reality TV” or you provide the world with your accessible, yet fundamentally flawed perspective on reality.

Plus, I’m 25. My demographic isn’t exactly spoken to by someone our age. Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert are awesome, don’t get me wrong, but they aren’t 25. I am. If they are to truly succeed, they also need someone in the younger ranks that’ll carry the banner with them, and I see no better candidate than myself. (C’mon, you hired Tucker Carlson! You need to redeem yourselves for THAT.) With a 10 PM timeslot, I can be the perfect primer for those Stewart/Colbert audiences. They can watch “Mr. Controversy”, then they can watch “The Daily Show” and “The Colbert Report”, and then they can watch Adult Swim reruns/Futurama reruns/watch me again at Midnight.

Finally, I’d like to offer one final argument. I’m turning to mathematics once more to prove why I’m right, so you won’t be able to get past this argument.

If...News = Controversy; And…I'm “Mr. Controversy”; Then…I’m perfect for a News position at MSNBC.

I’ll be waiting for your call.

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