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Mike Reyes, aka Mr. Controversy, has considered himself a writer ever since he was a child. He wrote for various school publications from about 1995 until 2006, and currently runs both The Bookish Kind and Mr. Controversy, which is an offshoot of the regular column he wrote in High School. He's also authored several short stories such as "The Devil's Comedian", "The Devil v. George W. Bush", and most recently "Wait Until Tomorrow". He resides in New Jersey. Any inquiries for reprinting, writing services, or general contact, should be forwarded to: michaelreyes72@hotmail.com

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Monday, May 17, 2010

The Monday GAAAH! (5/17/10)



Weekends are like good movies...over too short, and always making you wait for a sequel.  Monday's here, and it's time to break on through to Tuesday.  Hang on kids, time to GAAAAH our way out.


- Hate Mail  supreme rained in on the Bieber piece on Friday.  Ok, so when I say "rained in" I mean only three messages that were posted by either one person or a co-ordinated group.  Still, fun stuff, and it makes me eager to write the Miley Cyrus Musical Anatomy piece.

- Iron Man 2 earned itself another weekend at the top, with Robin Hood and Letters to Juliet bringing in Second and Third place finishes respectively.  Don't forget, this week is the last to see Iron Man 2 in IMAX before Shrek invades all locations for the little ones.  (But some screens might still be doing Midnight Weekend showings.  Check your locations for details.)  Here's this week's Futile Box Office Projections:

1. Shrek The Final Catastrophuck
(Does anyone really know what the name of this movie is?  It seems to be changing quite often.  So far we've had Shrek Goes Forth, Shrek Forever After, and now Shrek The Final Chapter 3D.  Nevertheless, the kids will flock, it'll make money, I'll weep for animated cinema.)

2. Iron Man 2
(Go ahead...YOU try to tell Tony Stark he's a failure.  I dare you.  He'll just show you up, and make  you cry like a bitch.)

3. Macgruber
(Ladies, you're gonna get dragged to this one, and boy does it look "Direct to DVD"riffic.)

Lovable Loser of the Week: Iron Man 2, for losing all of its IMAX screens to the big green idiot, so as to rob it a true chance of competing with Dark Knight, who had a several month window of release.

Loathable Winner of the Week: Shrek the Final Chapter 3D, because it'll strike a blow against storytelling in children's films and win a victory for Pop Culture references/3D everything.

- A Waitress was fired recently for mocking a couple that tipped her lousily through Facebook.  Meanwhile that horrible bitch that marched out the door and yelled at my friends and I for stiffing her due to really poor service was probably never fired.  I know, Service Professionals get paid shit but when you screw up big on an order and cause a problem, don't expect much.  Still, fired for Facebook griping?  This is why companies need more transparent Social/New Media guidelines, as well as more company integrated Facebook access for employees.  You keep track of employees, possibly keep negative comments in house, and generally promote a sense of community for your workforce.

- This Week's MSN Headline Lulz:

Delta pilot & concealed weapon | 'Vegetable Viagra'? ("How to Defend Yourself Against Fresh Produce" classes will benefit from this.  Their memberships will quadruple.)

'Lost' actor's 911 call | TV chef & murder plot  (Let it go, people!  Lost is over...it's run its course.  You want more Lost?  Fine, here's what you have to do.  Get drunk and start reading Franz Kafka and any college Philosophy course text books you have lying around.  Tape up a picture of a Polar Bear to your wall, and sit in front of the window so the sun's hitting you and Voila...Lost.)

- Glee has been announced in the Post Super Bowl Spot for next year's telecast on Fox.  Yep...now I have another reason to never watch the Super Bowl again.  (Besides Bruce Springsteen's camera hump.  The nation is still plagued by nightmares of it to this day.)

- Twitter Celeb of the Week: @justchristinah - she's fighting Cancer, but her sense of humor and her spirit to fight are still very much in tact.  She could use a bigger fan club, and I'm sure she'd appreciate the people to talk to.  Just saying.

- Summer is almost upon us, so go out and find a nice, huge beach read.  (And if any Libraries out there want to get rid of any plastic jacketed Hardcovers with light sand in them, I'll be glad to help take them off of your hands.  It adds character to the book, IMO.)

- Seriously...Save New Jersey's Libraries.  They've been there for you, now it's your turn.  Fuck budget tactics and preserve free reading/viewing/listening.

And now, your opening act for the week...Tom Jones and the Cardigans.



As an added bonus (and as a little bit of humor for Non-Bieber fans) here's a video from YouTube's own MakeMeBad35.  Not all of his stuff plays, but this definitely plays if anything for the best friend/psychiatrist and some of his reactions.

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